Now, on to my second post for Creative Writing Ink. This particular picture is quite interesting, I have to say.  Challenging as well! Feel free to criticize 🙂


It is 08:35 PM. I have a bottle of champagne on the front seat, neatly placed between my thighs. The bottle, which I’ve stolen from the liquor cabinet, is still tightly lid. My parents would ground me for life if (most likely ‘when’) they found out that their sweet and innocent 16-year-old son has decided to drink, in his newly bought car, alone, unsupervised.

But it doesn’t matter.

Nothing matters anymore.

Because I’m tired of being innocent. It has given me nothing but scars and bruises. ‘Innocent’ doesn’t really go with ‘cool’. It never did. Instead, it goes hand in hand with loneliness, constant staring, and daily shove against the locker. Simply put: the never-ending bullying.

So here I am, sitting alone in my car, a few meters away from Bill Cormacky’s front yard. I take a deep breath, swallow the remaining doubt that has been lingering for the past fifteen minutes, and open that bottle of cold champagne.

It hisses, reminding me of snakes. Then it sizzles and bubbles its way up to the surface, just like the inside of my stomach is feeling like right now. I almost jump out of the car as the liquid spills on my lap and seat. “Shit!” I quickly open the car window and let some of the champagne spill on the pavement.

Then, it’s all quiet.

Nothing is making a sound, as if giving me time to think everything over.

But the only thing playing in my head is all the pain and embarrassment I have had to go through throughout those excruciating high school years. Most were to Bill’s credit, the quarterback who thinks he owns the world just because he can run fast while holding a stupid ball. Bill has several ways to torture me, like the time he pushed me so hard I fell down the stairs (“Watch where you’re going, loserhead!”), or when he slammed my lunch tray so I had a bowl of casserole all over my hair and face (“Have a nice lunch, dick face!”), and how he ‘accidentally’ threw his football right to my face so I went blank and woke up thirty minutes later at the nurse’s office with balls of cotton up my nose (“It’s not my fault you exist!”). And finally, the last straw. When he humiliated me on public by pouring the full content of a beer can on my head while screaming, “Nerds and cowards like you don’t belong in this part of town!” at the top of his lungs, simply because I refused to finish his beer like he ordered me to.

So I take a huge gulp of that champagne.

And one gulp more.

And more, until my throat is burning and my temple is throbbing.

There!, the voice in my head screams. Who’s the loser now, huh?! I drank the whole thing, you worthless jackass!!!

Then, as if hearing all the screaming that went down inside my brain, the front door of Bill Cormacky’s house is open.

And there he is, dragging a huge trash bag with his headphones on.

My original plan was to come up to him dead-drunk with a bottle of liquor in hand to prove that I can be cool. But the moment I saw his face, all the anger comes rushing back.

Suddenly I know what I want to do. What I have to do, to show him what bullying is truly all about: nothing but pure pain.

So I grab the steering wheel with both of my hands.

My heart is pounding. My head is spinning.

The hell with innocence.


I know the picture is a London cab, but this is the story that popped in my head when I saw this picture.  I hope I’m not breaking any rules of this exercise…

14 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Novroz
    May 04, 2011 @ 11:58:23

    Hmm…it sounds like a true story 😉 lol
    We both have a hanging end in our story. i don’t think you will like mine tho.
    Another good short, I hope he got what he deserved and she got her revenge 😉


    • si_ulil
      May 04, 2011 @ 12:27:54

      It is somewhat true, but my bullying story is not *that* traumatic. I just think this bullying culture we have needs to stop. Sure, it is not as severe as they have in other countries, but it will only grow if we do nothing about it.

      Thanks for your comment. Will read yours soon! hehehe…
      The main character is a male, actually 😀


  2. Novroz
    May 04, 2011 @ 13:47:33

    you’ve been bullied? I thought there were no bullying in class of 08.

    aaa…yes, I forgot the word son! as I go on reading, couldn’t stop thinking it’s a girl, since you are a girl.

    …and that reminds me that I haven’t written any story with female character yet


    • si_ulil
      May 04, 2011 @ 14:28:06

      Not really bullied, but controlled around. I couldn’t stand up for myself. And no, it wasn’t in 28. It was in…..elementary. But that only made me stronger, hahahaha *curcol

      Yes, you should make one!


  3. Custard
    May 06, 2011 @ 12:14:28

    Very interesting. I like the way you built the picture in my mind, describing the sound of the champagne. Very clever.

    So bot you and Novroz wrote your stories from the same image? Its great how different the stories are.

    Thanks for sharing



    • Novroz
      May 06, 2011 @ 13:08:38

      The image was given by Creative Writing Ink and we have to be as creative as we can to come up with story based on the picture.


      • Custard
        May 06, 2011 @ 16:03:39

        ah I see, all makes sense now. You both did a cracking job…..:-)

      • si_ulil
        May 06, 2011 @ 17:26:56

        Yes, Novroz is obsessed with horror stories, while I….well, not so much 😛

        Thank you so much for your comment! You should join in on the fun!

      • si_ulil
        May 06, 2011 @ 17:27:27

        Novroz, thanks for approving these. You rock! hahahaha….

      • Novroz
        May 07, 2011 @ 11:35:19

        i was writting my book review when I saw a comment waiting for moderation…so I approved it 🙂

        sorry replying b4 you…when I saw it was from C, I instantly replied..hehe I forgot it’s not my blog 😉

  4. Cath
    May 06, 2011 @ 15:57:20

    Very dramatic, love it!


  5. Wanda
    May 07, 2011 @ 07:36:21



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